From time to time I get into the mind-set during which there is no tomorrow. Obviously I know there is a tomorrow but it doesn’t affect me where it would usually cause a little to an extreme amount of anxiety depending on what was going to happen. This may seem like a positive state of mind but it isn’t. Deadlines now don’t exist. This proves quite problematic when in school as repercussions will follow once I get to tomorrow; also I don’t get to look forward to anything. I am literally living in the moment. It unfortunately comes along with an amount of emotional numbness, not always complete emotional numbness, but enough to be unpleasant.
I have a theory that it may be a form of shutdown or the ‘hangover’ from a meltdown but I’m not sure. It makes sense that my brain would switch off my ability to look into the future and dampen my emotions to stop me getting too overwhelmed or to aid in the recovery from a meltdown, but I am no psychologist.
On the plus side I can stay up extremely late and not feel worried about how tired I will be in the morning… until the morning that is.