Trigger Warning: Sexual Assault
I was recently on my final weekend camp with cadets and I realised that there is a lot of sexual assault that goes on between male teenagers. Usually after the first night of the camp there are stories of boys ‘tea-bagging‘ one another and other similar activities. Now, this isn’t a new thing, but I’ve only just realised how odd/illegal it is.
Firstly, it’s non-consensual as it is usually done to someone when they are asleep, so it’s clearly a form of sexual assault. Secondly, most of these boys insult each other with gay slurs but they are quite happy to put their genitals into other boy’s mouths or on their faces (not that I’m suggesting gay people do this non-consensually or at all), which seems slightly hypocritical. This type of behaviour is generally accepted as normal, not just in cadets, but in most, if not all, teenage boys. So I never really thought about it being wrong, as I thought it was a weird boy thing. However I started to imagine what would happen if girls started to do this to one another. I’m sure that, if it happened on camp, the girl doing it would get kicked out of cadets at the very least and may also be arrested, which would be completely justified. But with boys none of this ever happens. It’s usually laughed of as ‘boys will be boys’, and nobody ever complains about it, but the fact remains that it is sexual assault. Just because the boys don’t complain about it doesn’t mean they’re okay with it. It probably means that they are under a ridiculous amount of social pressure to conform to the twisted norm of ‘masculinity’.
On the theme of masculinity (kind of), there is a lot more acceptance of gay/bi girls in cadets than there is of boys. There is a significant minority of girls who are openly gay or bi, but no boys that I know of. This seems to be because a girl being gay or bi is seen as more masculine, but a boy being gay or bi is seen as being feminine. Not that any of this is the case but it seems to be people’s perception of it
To conclude I think we not only need to teach teenage boys that it’s not okay to sexually assault one another but also that it is okay to tell people about it if someone has done something to them without consent.
Final note: I’ve finished all of my exams now so I should start posting more… If I remember…
Bye for now!
Today I was diagnosed with an Autism Spectrum Disorder. While my first reaction is to be extremely relieved (I spent the car journey to the appointment imagining the worst possible outcomes) I don’t really know how to feel/react now. I am happy that the diagnosis finally happened after waiting about six months for it, but there’s also a feeling of ‘what now?’ My mum wants the family to go out for a meal to celebrate, which is nice but slightly weird. It’s a bit strange because one wouldn’t usually celebrate a diagnosis, however my parents have had me pestering them about it for half a year so they’re probably glad it’s finally over!
What happens now is I have to send stuff to my current school and my prospective university so they can sort support and accommodations, which I will need if I am going to survive more than a week living in a city. Thankfully, there is a really good student support team at my current school who are all amazing but the person who looks after sixth formers is going to be even more amazing. Even though she is on maternity leave she is still going to sort some of my uni stuff and I can’t thank her enough! If everything works out I should get there in September with a support system in place.
I think I was expecting something more substantial than just the verbal confirmation that I’m autistic (they are also going to send me a letter). I don’t know what I expected, but I don’t think the news will sink in until I get that letter. Maybe I thought I would get a badge! Actually that’s not a bad idea…
Anyway I have to get on with
making a badge ‘revising’. Have a good week!
Yay! Finished my first A2 exam (I had an AS resit a few weeks ago). It went okay, nothing particularly spectacular on my part but I don’t think I crashed and burned. Unlike last year, this year I have extra time which made it a lot less panicky and my handwriting was considerably more legible. Also unlike my AS history I didn’t come out feeling so depressed that I went to buy a load of cheese (well I did buy a mozzarella and tomato melt for lunch but that doesn’t count). Strangely enough I seemed to have done more revision than a lot of people, who I assumed would have been revising for months but apparently haven’t. Anyway, I came home after spending the day revising at school with Elleni over at writerarelunatics et al because we have two exams tomorrow, *sigh*, and I went straight to bed for four hours… I swear I’m not lazy!
I don’t know what the point of this post was but I thought I’d give you an update! Good luck to anyone else who has exams!